Introduction

Darrell McGowan, the author behind this blog is a Southern California writer, pastor, father, and husband.  Yes2RedPill, the author’s screen name, is a reference to The Matrix – specifically, the scene where Neo chooses reality (the red pill) over the fantasy most of humanity lives (the blue pill.)  Darrell is a progressive Christian pastor serving First Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) in downtown Fullerton, CA, USA.  He passionately pursues helping people find deeper meaning and purpose in life.  These writings are a byproduct of the author’s commitment to live a deeply reflected life based on the teachings of Jesus of Nazareth.  You are invited to share these writings as widely as you choose and requested to give credit to their writer, though Darrell is delighted to know his words have been helpful to others, whether or not any readers remember his name.

Self-sacrifice, Self-indulgence, & Self-fulfillment

Self-sacrifice as a virtue is so exceedingly rare, it need not concern most of us at all. For an act of self-sacrifice to be virtuous, the benefit for others must be so substantial it outweighs the loss of the one sacrificed. A soldier who saves a platoon by diving on a grenade commits a virtuous act of self-sacrifice.

It is not virtuous to meet a need someone could and probably should meet for themselves, and it is disingenuous to commit such an act for the purpose of being viewed as self-sacrificing. In most instances, what passes for self-sacrifice is simply another vain attempt to win the approval of some other, including God, by conducting ourselves in a way that may benefit others, but when truth be told, benefits our ego-centric desire to be seen as good, holy, or righteous. The drive to be self-sacrificing only serves to cloak our self-indulgence.

Self-indulgence is acting on the impulses for personal satisfaction that pass through us all the time. It is more honest than our attempts to be viewed as self-sacrificing, but ultimately self-destructive since it draws us away from our deeper purpose and robs us of any lasting meaning.

Consider that which brings us the greatest joy—surrender to God who restores right relationship through our meaningful service to others. In Spirit-led service to others, whether in small acts of kindness or extraordinary acts of generosity, we find self-fulfillment. We don’t serve for the sake of recognition, because that is simply another form of self-indulgence. We readily acknowledge we serve because it brings us joy as we draw closer to Christ and to one another.

The source of all lasting joy is found in fulfilling the divine purpose for life: right relationship. Discovering, developing, and sharing our God-given gifts in the widest possible circle is the means through which we become instruments of God’s will and the coming kingdom of God. To be self-serving is inevitable, but it need not be self-indulgent; it can be self-fulfilling!  And  contrary to popular Christian myth, serving God by surrendering our lives to Christ and becoming an instrument of grace is rarely sacrificial, but it’s always fulfilling. Self-sacrifice is too often all about me; self-fulfillment is all about right relationship—with God and with others.

I will not seek to sacrifice myself, since it will only feed my egotistical desire for attention.  Instead I will diligently discover all the gifts God has given me, and I will seek the joy of surrending my life to God who will lead me to share my gifts in an ever-widening circle of right-relationship.

Powerless, Not Hopeless

Being Powerless Does Not Mean Being Hopeless

When I came to recognize that I was powerless over people, places, and things, I felt impotent. If I could not have power over others, how could I have power at all?  It took me a while to recognize that I have power over me. The most important use I make of this power is the view I take of my world.

I have the power to see myself at the mercy of a chaotic world which poses a different threat at the turn of every corner. I also have the power to see myself in a redeemed world where I share in the most powerful force in the universe: love. I can exercise my power to see my life as a gift to be received, and recognize the hope that is mine as I receive this extraordinary gift and awaken to the power of God (Love capitalized) in my life.

Hope is not logical. Many times, it seems completely irrational. It is a decision to believe in possibilities one can only imagine. It is a decision to trust imagination as the first step toward realization. It is a decision to continue striving when the evidence suggests that further effort is futile.

I can always choose to be hopeful. I can believe that I came into this world with a purpose and I can seek to fulfill that purpose. I can strive to discover and develop my gifts to open new possibilities for me and for others. And most of all, I can put all I am at the service of Love.

The Eternal Word lives in and through human beings, and when I surrender my life to God, I allow the Divine Sophia (Wisdom), the Eternal Logos (Word), Christ to transform the world. I am powerless, but Christ has the greatest power—the power of Love!

Love is never coercive, it is always persuasive. God lures the world toward hope, peace, joy, love! When I am willing to surrender to God, I experience Love’s intentions for my life and for our world.

Every disappointment gives me the opportunity to recognize there is still so much I do not know—so much I have yet to surrender. I can trust God to reveal more to me about myself, my relationships, and my life if I am open to learning.

I do not have power over the choices others will make, but I can provide a positive example if I choose life and love today! I can become a conduit of grace as I accept that I am powerless over others and give my life to Christ.

For so long, I tried to exercise power where I had none, and I was blind to the real power I had.  Now I recognize that I have the power to choose what world I live in and share with those I love.  This power is greater than any illusionary power I ever hoped to exercise!

 

If Love is Lord…

Who is God? Any time we surrender our will to someone or something, that to which we surrender we make god for that time and place. When we allow someone or something to become a power greater than ourselves, that person or experience functions as a god in our lives. There are all kinds of things we can give that kind of power: ego, intellect, industry, pleasure, objectivity, fear, envy, bitterness, resentment, revenge, pain, or loss, to name a few.

The Christian scripture uses two nouns as synonymous with God: love and light. If Christians take seriously the notion that God is love, then by extension, Christians surrender to love, recognizing love as the most powerful force in their universe. If Christians take the writers of John’s Gospel and 1 John seriously, they entrust their lives to love.

The great challenge of following Jesus is consistently surrendering your life to the God whom Jesus reveals, the same God whom John names love. Look closely at Jesus’ prayers. Jesus taught his followers to pray saying, “lead us not into temptation,” (Matthew 6:13) or as the NRSV renders the Greek, “do not bring us to the time of trial.” Notice he did not teach his followers to deliver themselves from temptation or save themselves from the test.  They are to pray that God will do this for them (that love will guide their steps.) Surrendering to God (to love) is the key to following Christ!

Jesus’ most common prayer in the New Testament is that God’s will be done. He teaches his followers to pray using the same phrase. The Christian faith, at its core, is all about surrendering to love.

Walking the loving path, following Jesus in every circumstance, is not about will power or determination. It is about surrendering to the Spirit of Christ. Sometimes our fierce independence leads us to balk at surrendering to anything or anyone. We want to be in charge—in control.

If we are honest with ourselves though, we will admit that we surrender our will all the time. We surrender to all kinds of impulses, experiences, individuals, and groups. The challenge of following Jesus is to surrender only to God, only to love, to light. When we are buffeted by life, we need to consciously choose where we grant influence or control. If we don’t make that choice consciously, we will make it unconsciously. We will grant influence to a passing emotion, a fleeting impulse, or a momentary desire.

So how do people become Christians? They surrender their lives to Christ–but here’s the rub–surrender is continual! Each moment, we are tempted to surrender our wills to countless emotions, impulses, desires, individuals, or groups.

How can anyone consistently surrender his or her life to Christ, give his or her life and will over to the God of love? Practice!  Those who are determined to follow Christ give their lives to love in the little things, in the everyday moments. They consciously give the little worries, frustrations, and passing trials to God, who is love. They entrust their lives to Christ-consciousness as they clean the house, take a walk through a beautiful neighborhood, and sit with a friend.  They become disciples inch-by-inch, moment-by-moment.  They condition themselves to trust God in the small things–in the seemingly mundane, so they can entrust their decisions to God when they face significant moments and meaningful decisions.

Who is God? Countless people have died defending their religious or philosophical answer to that question. Maybe it’s time we stopped worrying about defending our point-of-view. I am a Christian not because I find Christianity’s arguments more convincing.

I am a Christian because surrendering my life to Christ, who reveals the God of love, brings me peace that passes all understanding regardless of my circumstances. I know many others who have surrendered to love as well, and many come to that decision by means of other teachers, prophets, or experiences. I don’t think the path they took is near as important as the decision they have made. When Jesus was confronted by his disciples with the news that someone was healing in a name other than his (Jesus’), he directed his disciples to leave that person alone, saying “he who is not against us is for us.” We should applaud all who choose to surrender their lives to love!

In a practical sense, God is who or what you make god. Ideally, Christians give their lives to Christ, follow Jesus, surrender to love, and choose the loving path regardless of their circumstances. When they live that ideal, they provide a model for others to follow, and if those others need direction, Christians can guide others to follow Christ. When people surrender their lives to love regardless of the path that leads to their decision, we should all rejoice, for whomever is not against us is for us!

Mindfulness

The endless chatter our minds generate rarely slows to less than 1000 words per minute. Since the average person reads about 250 words a minute and speaks about 400 words a minute, that same person entertains several unrelated ideas as they try to concentrate on the words they are reading, the presentation to which they are listening, or even the thoughts they are speaking aloud.

When we try to force ourselves to shut out the seemingly extraneous and concentrate on our chosen focal point, we are usually frustrated. The mind cannot slow down enough for one train of thought to occupy our attention for long. If we manage to banish an unhelpful idea so we can focus on a particular task, our mind simply brings forth other ideas. It’s not surprising that we lose focus throughout the day; it’s amazing we maintain focus long enough to accomplish anything.

How can we harness the mind’s extraordinary processing power without being driven to distraction? We practice mindfulness.

Practicing mindfulness is a lot like parenting a three year-old. Have you ever tried to ignore a three year-old? A child determined to receive your attention is tenacious!  They will call out, “Mom!” or “Dad!” countless times growing more and more insistent until you turn and give them your attention.

Ignoring or trying to banish the ideas that float to the surface of your mind is useless. Your mind will just become more insistent until it wrests your attention away from your original focus.

The key to mindfulness is learning to be a dispassionate observer of your mind. Rather than ignoring distractions, you acknowledge them and turn your attention gently back to your focus. If the idea needs immediate attention, you attend to it briefly and return to the object of your focus. If the idea needs attention, but it is not urgent, you jot it down on a notepad, cell phone, PDA, or laptop. In other words, you give the unbidden idea the attention it demands and turn back to the object of your original focus.

The mind is a powerful tool, but it needs to be directed. If we don’t supply the direction, the mind will, but because of its extraordinary capacity, it will have us bouncing from one idea to another–great for brainstorming, not so good for progressing toward a goal.

The next time you find yourself struggling to maintain focus, step back and observe your mind for a few minutes. Try not to get attached to any of the ideas floating in your head. Let them come into focus, jot them down if they’re important, then let them go. In a few minutes, you’ll feel yourself calming, your mind will slow, and you will recognize the area where you need to focus your attention. From that point forward, when an errant idea arises acknowledge it and gently return your focus.

If I want to be more focused, I need to recognize my mind processes far more information than I can consciously examine.  I will be gentle with myself when information rises unbidden to consciousness, take note when that information is helpful, and let it go when it is not. Focus is not the result of eliminating distraction; rather, it is the result of dealing with distraction productively.

Balance

One of the greatest challenges we face is keeping our life in balance.  It is so easy to allow one area of life to overwhelm the rest.  In most cases, when that happens, it is the area of work overwhelming our lives.  Most people recognize the value of setting goals and prioritizing tasks in relationship to work.  Many places of business pay a lot of money to bring in motivational speakers and give their employees time off to emphasize the value of developing clearly identified goals and charting a course toward reaching them.  Unfortunately, many of us who have set goals for work have failed completely to apply the same principles to our lives as a whole.  We talk about the importance of family, self-care, and personal dreams, but because we have not set goals and identified how we are going to reach those goals outside of work, our actions fall far short of our talk.  If we want to look back over the course of our lives and see that we have accomplished those things we drempt of accomplishing, we need to take time now to chart our course.

This week, I will set goals and priorities for my personal life.  I will bring those goals together with my professional goals and identify overall priorities.  Finally, I will dedicate time each week to reaching my personal goals.

Silence is Golden

We can help others find the path to wholeness through the circumstances they face, but we must remember God’s way prepared on their behalf is for them to discover.  We can help them in that discovery process by affirming their gifts and talents and encouraging their demonstration of love and forgiveness.  We cannot find the path for them and advise them as to where or how it is to be found.  Each of us must find our own way.  Instead, we can share our experience finding the path God prepared through our darker days.  We can offer hope as we reassure them that no one is abandoned by God.  We can offer strength as we are faithful in our relationship with them.  And, most importantly, we can offer silence as we listen attentively instead of offering advice.

It’s reassuring to know that even when I do not feel particularly spiritual or enlightened I can be of service by remaining quiet.  My willingness to offer an attentive ear may be the greatest gift I offer today.

The Roadside

When I am on the road, I pay scarce attention to the roadside.  It is the boundary place between progress and chaos, a collection of discards, castoffs, and misfortunes, a danger zone.  And yet, the roadside is where most of life happens.  While I am blazing down the road on foot or in a vehicle with my route and my destination firmly in mind, miracles are exploding around me.  Creation yearns to express beauty, and so, no matter how many roads we pave, beautiful flowers will spring up along the roadside wherever nature permits and human oversight allows.  People will stop along the roadside again and again, asking for directions, sharing a story, and catching their breath.  Campgrounds will be built, colonies of every living thing will spring up, and entire neighborhoods will be formed along the roadside.  Roads make us more efficient, but we do not truly live until we exit the expressway and engage the creative chaos of life!

Who will I meet along the road I travel today if I am willing to slow down long enough to engage?  Might they teach me how to love or give me an opportunity to share my experience, strength, and hope?  Today I will let go of my obsession with movement, engage the seeming chance encounter, and pay attention to the beauty, the opportunity, the life along the roadside.

Be Gentle With Yourself

There are times when you need to push yourself a little bit and expend more effort to accomplish a given purpose.  How do you know when to press forward and when to let go?

Pressure does little to enhance your ability to learn from past errors.  The past is only a memory, a distant shadow of what once was; it is no longer a reality.  The past cannot be changed, so there is no point in treating yourself harshly over what you have come to recognize as mistakes once made.  You must be gentle with yourself as you look to the past and take from such a review only those lessons which you can apply going forward.

If you are willing to forgive yourself for errors you have made, you will find it much easier to try again.  Guilt serves no long-term, positive purpose—it should call forth reflection, the making of amends where appropriate, and right action in the present.  If guilt is sustained after it has served its purpose, it distracts from the footwork you can do today to be of service to others.  Whenever you look to the past, you need to be especially gentle with yourself.

I cannot offer to someone else what I do not have.  I must develop compassion for myself, then, if I am to offer it to anyone else.  Forgiving one’s self is a prerequisite to being gentle with others.

Faith

“Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.”

We all live by faith.  Those who don’t acknowledge their dependence on faith are simply defining the term too narrowly.  Faith is not a religious term, although religious people often speak of faith more freely.

Each morning we arise and face another day, we take several leaps of faith.  Showing up for school, work, or some other obligation demonstrates faith that the effort to get out of bed will reap rewards.  Applying ourselves to any task shows faith in our ability to affect our circumstances.  Making a relational commitment to another person shows faith in ourselves and in the other person to fulfill a mutual commitment.  We can make very few decisions without underlying faith.

The question, then, is not “will we live by faith?” but “where will we place our faith?”  We can exercise faith narrowly, broadly, or anywhere in-between.  If we have faith in nothing outside ourselves, we become narcissistic and paranoid.  We will choose to trust no one.  We will see every breach of trust, no matter how small, as evidence that faith in others is always misplaced.  The reciprocal statement is true too: If we see every breach of trust as evidence that faith in others is unjustified, we will become narcissistic and paranoid.  Drawing our circle of faith too narrowly is self-destructive.

If we are going to engage life meaningfully, we have to exercise faith outside ourselves.  Doing so always carries risk.  Every person whom we know for any length of time will disappoint us.  We either use those disappointments to justify withdrawing faith in anything outside ourselves, or we brush off the disappointment and risk again.  If we are determined to live life to the full, we really only have one choice–to have faith in ourselves and extend faith outside ourselves.

Having faith in a power greater than ourselves is simply a decision to recognize the importance of extending faith into circumstances beyond our control.  Whether we define a power greater than ourselves as God, as a group of people in whom we trust, or in humanity, the decision to extend our faith is essential to wholesome living.  Faith allows us to optimistically engage life!

A Note To Christians

What’s In a Name?

There was a time when naming was a sign of power and a solemn commitment.  One did not name another person, call him by name, or act in his name, unless one was willing to be bound to the one named.  To give one’s name was to grant another power over you, and to entrust the other with responsible use of that power.  To declare that you will live and act in the name of another was to declare absolute loyalty and allegiance.  In turn, one who had demonstrated unswerving loyalty would often be rewarded by being granted the right to exercise power in the name of the one served.

When early Christians acted, refused to act, or even prayed in the name of Jesus, they did so understanding the loyalty they proclaimed and the risk they took professing loyalty to anyone other than the emperor.  Early Christians put their lives on the line by living “in the name of Jesus Christ.”

What difference does it make in your life to live your life, take action, or pray “in the name of Jesus Christ?”  What risk do you take by loving God with your heart, mind, soul, and strength, and loving your neighbor as yourself?

Today, most of us act in our names only.  We respect a few folks whom we know personally, but someone claiming to act in the name of another, even in the name of Jesus, doesn’t move us much.  We have seen too many people who claim the name of Jesus and live principles foreign to that name.  We are accutely aware of those times we have acted in ways contrary to the Name, even as a cross dangled from our necks.  Naming has lost its power…almost.

Surrendering our lives and our wills to One greater than ourselves still carries power.  That power is not diminished by the human frailties of the ones who claim the Name. To claim the Name is to surrender all false power and pretense.  To claim the Name is to surrender to the One revealed by the life, teachings, death, and resurrection of Jesus.  To claim the name of Jesus is to proclaim that God is Love, to live by a life principle of love, and to bend one’s will to love.  To claim the name of Jesus is to surrender our lives to the One Who Has Always Loved Us.

We will still make mistakes.  We will miss the mark.  When we do, living in the name of Jesus means we will seek and offer forgiveness, because we have chosen absolute loyalty to the Name through which we were commanded to love one another.  May we all live this day “in the name of Jesus.”

Today, I lay down my false bravado and my illusion.  I choose to surrender to Love.  Whether others call that Love “God,” “Higher Power,” “Jesus,” “Yahweh,” “Allah,” or something else, is not important.  I surrender to God who is love in the name of Jesus, and Jesus commanded me to love my neighbor as myself.  To live in the name of Jesus is to do as Jesus commanded, and today I recommit myself to the Name.